Stop Whining

I forgot to mention that I have been waiting for a court date for two months. In retrospect I haven't been waiting all that long. At least I have a referral. Ms. P will come when it's time.

Endless Wait

I have been waiting for Miss P. for so long. I receive pictures and she is growing up without me. It just doesn't make sense that I am still waiting with no official words. I feel hopeless about this situation.

NO COURT DATE!!!!! NO NEW INFORMATION!!!!! NOTHING!!!! THIS AND THE COURTS ARE SCHEDULED TO CLOSE SOON!!!!

I am normally a very patient but it's getting to be a bit much!

Reciprocity

Yesterday I made him smile. I smiled back in return.

Awakened in Tears.

For one quick moment I had my family in tact. The love of my life was in the bed beside me and my Q in her room.

Wow what a dream.

Afraid to Feel.

There's another feeling in my heart and I am so afraid to give in to it.

Still Waiting

I am overdue. The baby should have dropped. But I am still waiting for Ms. Precious. No court date, no news, no nothing. Several families have traveled and I was able to get more pictures and videos of the little sweetie.

I sent a small package with a family almost a month ago, but I haven't heard anything from them. I am not sure whether they are back yet. I don't want to seem like a pain so I do not contact them. When the one month mark hits I will check in. Until then I will cherish the pictures that I have.

Sometimes Silence is What I Need

You know the old saying. If you have nothing nice to say, shut the *bleep* up! Ok your mom didn’t put it quite that way. But you get the drift. I would like to add another. This one applies to what to say or not to say to a grieving mother.

On the day after I got the news of my baby’s tragedy, there were many visits from well wishers and concerned individuals. Most didn’t know what to say to me. but wanted to comfort me nevertheless. So I heard many I’m sorry for your loss or If I can do anything for you please do not hesitate to ask. People meant well. I do realize that the subject of death is just so difficult.

What do you say?

Well here’s a little of what not to say:

• Do not tell me that God wanted another angel because that’s just a lie. The God I serve is loving and would not put me through such agonizing pain!

• Do not tell me that it was in His plan either.

• Do not tell me that you know how exactly how I feel. Because unless you have lost a child you cannot imagine how I feel. You do not have a clue.

• And for goodness sake DO NOT TELL ME THAT I CAN GET A PUPPY!!!!! Yes someone did!

The single most act of comfort came from a woman, a fellow mom. She said nothing but she gave me the tightest hug that you can imagine. I will remember that always.

So if you do not have a clue about what to say to a grieving mom, JUST SAY NOTHING!!!
Just be there if you dare to be that shoulder to cry upon. Be that sounding board, be a loving friend.